my legitimate strangeness

This is an essential point. We will never reach an apotheosis in which we will have transcended ourselves and our predicaments. If disillusion is to mean anything concrete, this is what it should point to; not a Utopia enshrined in other terms, not some worldly Nirvana; but a shift in accommodation; along with modes of thought and behavior that tend to support humility, kindness, and a sense of our vulnerability; as capacities we cannot live without.